The Past Shapes You, But Should Not Define You

Waiting 2 by coolza at www.sxc.hu

The separated couple were talking to me.  He said, “She never thinks I am good enough or believes in me!”  She replied, “I believe in him, I am just disappointed with his actions.  He fails by making poor decisions, and then blames it on me not believing in him.  He lives with a chip on his shoulder, always expecting others to think he can’t do it!”

As the conversation went deeper and the relationship developed it became apparent that his issue found its root in the rejection of his father.  He rarely saw his father.  He never had his approval or a relationships with him.  It left him deeply wounded and hurting.  He grew up always feeling like he had to prove himself, which lead to the inability to place his trust in others.  He then would often live out these expectations by making mistakes that harm his relationships.

This is just one story.  You consider your story or the story of others around you.  Maybe it is your marriage that needs to apply this principle.  

Here it is …

The Past Shapes You, But Should Not Define You!

You must understand that the past has made you who you are today, but it does not have to rule and control who you are today.  The story of Joseph is a wonderful study of this principle (Gen. 37-50).  Joseph was rejected by his brothers and sold to slavery.  He was accused of rape and placed in prison.  He was forsaken in prison by those he helped for years.  Finally he was elevated to a great leader in Egypt.  He was then challenged to forgive his brothers who unknowingly come to him for food.  Joseph in each stage of his life, chose to allow the past to shape him, but not to define him.  He was a man of integrity and faith in each place in life.

The glory of the gospel is that we are forgiven and receive a new birth at baptism (2 Cor. 5:12-21).  The past shapes us, but it does not define us (see Moses, Paul, and Peter for other examples).

Consider your past, but quite allowing it to define you!  Break free from it through Christ and live in the present.  Press forward to the goals ahead and be who God called you to be today and in the future.  Don’t be crippled by the past!